Each year I honor myself at my birthday. I do this slightly differently each year, depending on my mood (and my year!). The purpose of the ritual is to honor myself, and mark my progress toward my goals.
I generally begin with a cleansing, to wash away the dirt of the past year and begin afresh. If I feel I can afford it, I schedule a facial or massage and give myself a real treat.
Once cleansed, I sit at my altar and contemplate my year. I dredge up the things that happened in the past year that still hurt, and examine them. Quite often we hold onto pain longer than necessary, so I dump all the pain that's weighing me down. (This can be a difficult process some years. Sometimes this "review & purge" part takes several days of Journaling to get through... but it's worth it.) I also review all the things that I don't like about myself, and examine those thoughts carefully. I often find criticisms that didn't originate from me, but from someone else. I stare down every self-criticism, and decide carefully whether or not they are justified.
Next, I review all of my accomplishments, and the ways that I have done things I like. I often struggle with this, although it's getting easier. Some of us have to get past an inner resistance to be proud of our accomplishments. I remind myself of all the things I like about myself, and all the things I've done in the past year to live truer to my inner ideal. Every little thing counts... I don't shortchange myself.
Finally, I create a mental image of myself as I'd like to become. I don't leave anything out. From my physical appearance and health, to my inner spirit and goals, I build up a clear vision of the person who I'd most like to see when I look in a mirror. Holding this image clearly in my mind, I anoint myself with consecrated oil to seal this vision to me.
At this point, as part of this process, I give myself a birthday gift. It will either be something I make for myself during this ritual (an amulet or other small craft), or something special that I buy and consecrate during this ritual. This ideal self-image is the real gift that I give to myself, and as I anoint the gift, I seal this new "me" to my gift. Throughout the year, this gift serves as a reminder of who I really am.
And when you're all done... time for Cakes and Ale! Celebrate with food, drink, family, and friends. Be happy for yourself, and enjoy your day.
Happy Birthday!
~Flame RavenHawk
August 10, 2002